it was a realisation heading towards me and my life in berlin that my time in the fatherland was coming to an end. I had spent 4 years in berlin and every day was filled with pure excitement of gaining confidence as a city man. I had witnessed so much in such a short space or a few years but my life in berlin will live with me forever because it was the best years of my live and if I could repeat it all over again then I would. regardless of what ever happens in the future you have to embrace life to the max and fill every minute with excitement. it was a great moment of joy. my last year working outside of berlin gave me time to reflect upon my family back in somerset England. that was my home and I need to get back there to start my future there again. the phone call I made to speak to my parents came as a bit of a shock because I had been told by my father that he had to go into hospital for a quadruple heart bypass so I decided to fly back to England for a couple weeks to see my family and visit my father who was in hospital. once achieved I headed back to Germany to wrap things up with work etc. well the day I arrived home in bernberg I received a phone call from my cousin Fiona asking why I hadn’t call into London to visit her. she decided to hook up with me in berlin which we did for the weekend and on that weekend we decided to marry. she flew back to London and in just 6 weeks time we were married in Hounslow Middlesex. when the time is right I will re-visit berlin and reminisce through those early years of the 1990s which changed my life forever. the rest is HISTORY..
blog…10.looking back.
although my last years were working outside of berlin it never stopped me from returning back to the glory of berlin. this city really did het under my skin and even today I still dream of returning one day for a revisit but without all the hectic stuff involved. looking back through those years im amazed how I survived but it was exciting and I made sure I had lots of fun. if you recall I was still avoiding the courts fior the taxi robbery charge and that fateful day arrived after me and andy, a friend from hull, managed to fall into a fight one night which ended up with both of us getting arrested and have a guess what I was remanded straight to moabit prison, which may I say scared the shit out of me purely because I felt so alienated being a foreigner. for the next 3 weeks I laid in my cell sweating everyday thinking this is it im going down again, like I did in England, but I was thinking this is Germany so how many years am I going to get. eventually a warden opened my cell door and instructed me to get ready for the court appearance. I was as nervous as I had ever been. I was scare of going down. I was placed into a security van with other prisoners, mostly german but a couple of americans wer up the same day on a double murder charge which made me feel slighty better but never the less I was still instructed by my English speaking german solicitor. all the way through this case of me attempting to rob a taxi driver for just a couple hundred marks completely got to me because I was totally innocent against the English hating taxi driver who I damned to death either way if a got sentenced or set free because he lied through his rotten gob. mr browne are you ready to stand trial I was asked and so I stepped into court and placed inside a see through metal cage which made me feel like I had commited a double murder aswell. so as the charges were read out and translated to me I started sweating and getting nervous again. the taxi driver was sat at the front of the court with the back of his head towards me. the prosecution began first and then the defence and then the judges disappeared for roughly 20 minutes and that 20 minutes felt like a week. 3 judges came back into the court room and seated themselves with the paperwork infront of them which would seal my future. the head judge started speaking whilst my solicitor translated to me. without any hesitance the words I heard first were please can you immediately release mr browne from the court house because as the evidence shows we find him NOT GUILTY. within half an hour after signing my release papers I was back out on the streets. the taxi driver was charged for taking my 20 marks and was put on a probation order. I told the truth and the truth came out. so now it was time for another celebration. tresor it was for me.
blog…9.losing control and leaving berlin.
it wasn’t just the historical knowledge development that caught my attention of how such a fasinating city berlin is but the massive bright lights and all the destractions that come with it seemed to have taken control of my interest which triggered something inside me which is athe that point I lost total control and began to investigate and discovered that underneath the streets of the city there apparently appeared more to be happening than what I had anticipated and had bargained for. I found living in berlin 20yrs ago verymind blowing and very exciting. first and foremost berlin is a European city well known for its parties, its eccentricricity, it vibrant buzz and most of all the side to berlin that I was completely nieve to and that’s the party scene and the stimulants that are involved and of course without forgetting how many gay people are in berlin. its a very sexy and sexual city and the people involved are really open minded and educated and very partiful which for some reason or other I seemed to fit in ok and gathered together a string of close friends from all walks of life and race. I cant deny talking about the abundance of all types of narcotics which were always readily available where ever you went. my self destruct button as I was unaware of at the time seemed to have been pressed to its full capacity because once I had the discovered the night life and all its ravishing going ons there was no way of turning back. the likes of tresors, e-werk, café Moscow, the kit kat club and many more which were meeting places for the social techno and drug addict party finders and goers. I didn’t realise at that my next 3yrs living in berlin was to become the biggest party I had ever commited myself to and I hit it to the max. I had picked up many addictions both mentally and physically and it was difficult to control. I was having to much fun to worry about the future and the conseqences that eventually fell on my worn out lap. what amazed me through all this partying were the places I frequented every weekend for 3yrs and each time I ventured out I found new places, deeper underground which bought more intense partying and hiding away from the world but more importantly my life. it spiralled completely out of control and I was unable to stop it. the force of earning a big wage packet every week only seemed to make matters worse because it was affordable to do these things and still work and live comfortably. I became a heavy narcotic user which took over my being and my life and I desperately need to find a way out of my dangerous predicament and fast. the historical aspect of berlin had faded for me and I needed a way to relight the fire for the love of berlin city. how could I allow something that I loved so much allow to desroy me. well I wasn’t prepared for total wipe out so I decided my only way out was to move out of berlin and begin a new life living far away from the city. I eventually move about a 3hr drive away from berlin and started a new job in a place called bernberg which I stayed for my remaining time in the fatherland..
blog…8.berlin as it is today.
with 40yrs of intense re-building berlin city stands shoulders above most cities of today. with its sheer determination and bounce-back from the grave attitude and its historical past which is packed with so many atrosities and stories berlin can now shine its glitter to those who live there and visit. berlins remarkable recovery is here to be seen in picture as it is today….. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmTlmp4Xxac
blog…7.total destruction.
take a look at the aftermath of berlin city. virtually every building was effected by the constant bombings and thousands of lives lost…..http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaN_-qiVXX8
blog…6. berlin is a very soulful and gripping place.
I was by now from what I had seen and discovered from some of the real life history deep within its hidden secrets delighting in its sparkle. berlin is a place with a constant mythical aura about its well being but more than that berlin always carried on its brandenberg gates shoulders the ever present damage that the war had done to this city. it was rooted to the ground. most of all the buildings had been bombed over and over and over. it was a city totally un-recognisable. from what remnance of the war I had witnessed like the bombed buildings and buildings showered with bullet holes where the jews were put up against and shot, it was stuff like this that sparked an interest for me to delve further into the history of berlin. it needs an aweful lot of pages to fill the complete history of such an unforgiving and relentless city yet it has strength to re-bulid and to re-gain its stance. berlin has seen generation after generations of the economic and massive political highs and lows. its inheritance of war torn potitical leaders and generators for so many in such an un-orthodox and inhuman manner. psychopathic and relentless killings and murders in their millions and berlin was maybe the centre of attention city by many an allie. its destruction through the war in retrospect pays the price for so many killings. from berlin the orders kept roaring out from hitlers lips. kill kill kill. that was the answer and that is was he instrumented throughout his sadistic career. the loss of hitlers power led to his suicide and the remains of a sunken and demoralised city. as it is today berlin over the last 30yrs has shown us how it remains one of the most amazing and feeling of awe cities when your there. it has bared its soul to the ground but has rebuilt its self still with the historical aspects very visible to the eye but yet making the new builds fitting in and taking a serious part of intergral and innovating art from the architects who endure there time in order to resurrect berlins sky line to its former glory. even today I often think about when I lived in berlin. I was on my own and I felt on my own and it also made me slightly paranoid because as the months were rolling by and I was getting deeper and deeper into the under-ground techno scene it was becoming apparent to me that I was involving myself into house clubs techno clubs but more seriously I was becoming addicted to the nightlife and its entertainment. I was indulging my lifestyle to new and extreme heights. it was time for me to have a re-think….
blog…5.gobsmacked twice.
its a most peculiar feeling I have to say living in a foreign country with a language that is in the far distance of your ear and with a striving effort and eagerness to try and at least understand some of the spoken german word. I discovered that I had was having a major crisis in picking up and producing a sentence in german and im positive it wasn’t for the want of not trying because I was and it became very apparent that I was progressively trying harder and harder but without stringing anything together. I could greet people and say hello, how are you or order some food, quite important when your hungry, and obviously how to ask for a beer and another if needed. teaching myself german was a taunting task for me. on one hand it was like I was at a german teaching school anyway because most of the people at work only spoke broken English just as I did with german which actually was quite good because even though our communication skills were at an all time low we somehow managed to get our message across and discover more words everyday. I gave up trying to speak german after the first year and began studying and meditating on this tongue twister of a language. day in day out I listened and listened and listened to the german language as it was in my everyday life and I wanted that language to become part of me and me of it. what is the point if you don’t understand what is being said around you. to me I felt I had to leanr to understand then hopefully words will fit into the right place. a year went by and I had accustomed myself to the pronounciation from the german tongue. its the same in every city you visit, there are different slangs for different areas and berlin was certainly no different. to me, because I had only generally mixed with east berlins and the eastern side of berlin becomes very strong, direct but yet more convincing than the softer spoken side of the west but never-the-less when spoken and used within its full context can become just as loud and as boisterous and scary as any east sider. I felt at ease on the east side of berlin, it was more relaxed, liberated and it seemed to have a calmer pace to its step and to be more genuine and meaningful people who could tell some amazing and yet very true historical stories either about there families being in the war or they were related to jewish or they were separated from their families as the berlin wall went up. one story could lead on to a whole evening or even a completes night worth of multi-conversations and lifes and places and the people who are in it. the flow of conversation on a warm berlin summer evening with people who often enough I had met for the first time but that was no reason for all those nights that passed through my life in berlin were definatly the most enjoyable. the problem being all these conversations were mainly done in English but with the odd german lesson here of there from a couple of beautiful Danish or Swedish girls which would be enough to completely throw your English lesson right down the drain and become very embarrassed about the fact that you cant take your eyes of the stunning ladies. in those early months of me venturing out into the suburbs of east berlin was a very subtle learning curve in the build up of trust with in a city. I was aware of how dangerous parts of berlin were but yet it was in me to exploit my boundries to learn, live and become a part of the active city life in which I was very much enjoying at the time. the trend being upon my arrival into the city centre was to meet up on a Friday evening in tacheles with a mass of cosmopititan people that were up for the same thing as me. to let our hair down. the buzz and the atmosphere was stunning and a relief. it was great to see so many people meeting new friends from other parts of the world ans so so many convesations and people to keep with. it was a very inspiring moment in my life and my very first real experience of be able to relax in the knowledge that I was safe with these totally cool and interesting people. I remember an American man who used to wonder round homeless bound but he was very clever with his speech of wisdom. I learnt a great deal from mark the American man. his talk would ramble and ramble but with enough genious interest in order for you to carry on listening to him. his main story was how he escaped from an American jail and had taken him a year and a half to get to berlin on the run and maintained to be on the run for as long as I knew him. mark if your still alive and you can hear me I prey with all my worth you are safe and well. hopefully meet someday again. another rebelious type of looking man I got to know was a midget man called snurf and he too was also on the run. I think at this point its fair to say that berlin consists of a certain amount of criminality and mostly related to the fields of narcotics. snurf would often come running into tacheles and hide behind the crowd of people far from the on-coming searing police force because snurf had been nicking bottles of vodka from the super-store yet again. we would see him for a few days then maybe again in a couple months when he had been freed from jailed. poor snurf because he was so disabled. his feet were inverted and he was only about 5ft tall. he always had a beard, a big black one a it was really curly. bless snurf. another friend who I had meet at tacheles was another bloke also called mark and he used to collect glasses for tacheles and earn a wage. he also was a raging alcoholic, a vodka one. he drank 2 or 3 bottles a day. he lived in a gypsy caravan on site of tacheles and we would spend many a cold night getting drunk and telling stories and just having a laugh. made had a brother called chad who I had meet once but since got sent to prison for murdering a herion addict, you may find this hard to believe but 10 years later I was walking down taunton high street with my mother and I saw chad, dressed the same as ever, like a rag doll of a hippy, walking towards me shouting hey kev I cant believe its you. I though fuck me I cant believe this. anyway we spoke for 15 minutes and to my disbelief mark his brother had caught frost bite on both his feet and had to have amputation which led him back to ottery-saint-mary which is where they are from. gobsmacked twice.
blog…4.berlins social gathering point. TACHELES.
with my new home set in place and a little more knowledge of berlin it was now time for me to fulfil my ambition of heading straight into the heart of the city. I had been constantly working week in week out and always managed to save some money, I started up a bank account and always put some money aside just in case I had to go back to England or if something happened to me, for whatever reason I left aside enough for emergencies. I had been in berlin now for 9 months and only having one trip back to England to pay back the money I owed to my family and keen to get back to berlin and do my thing. I was keen to let the my hair down like I had never done before. I had a fairly strict up bringing due to my father and therefore I was always precautious about what I was doing and where I was. by now I had viewed the east and southern side of berlin and now I was living just west of kruezberg which is the posh side and pretty near the central of berlin as I would like to be. I found the district of Kreuzberg a very interesting part of Berlin. It was artistic, multicultural, scene district of Berlin (like Mont Martre in Paris) full of ethnic minorities (Turks mainly), artistic shops and works. Its western part was richer, more luxary and less crazy, I could say. And this district had its darker face as well, modern tower blocks which formed anonymous concrete jungle around Hallesches Tor and Kottbusser Tor. It was not the cleanest and not my favourite part of Berlin to be honest so I would venture inward bound to the main attraction from what I had heard about which was a so called café sat at the main end of oranienberger tor strasse called tacheles and not far from one of berlins main train station set in the district of mitte on friedrich strasse (street) this was to be my first inner city destination so on a Friday evening I set my target and headed straight for this so called famous café. I remember getting off the friedrich strasse train station and that was a piece of wonderous art itself. the train station was built in 1878 and it looked in perfect working order and I was totally gobsmacked because of its sheer size and it absolutely spoke volumes of history right there before my eyes as indeed the rest of the berlin I had witnessed. I had never seen anything like it and that was just the station. in previous months where I had ventured out and about just sight seeing to see if I could spot the remaining parts of the berlin wall which I had managed to find. there are still bits of the berlin wall still standing today on the outer skirts of berlin and one of the best sites to see part of the wall is actually in kruezberg which I had strolled by on many occasions. so my immediate attention was on this café called tacheles and I knew it wasn’t far from the train station I had just stepped off. within 15 mins I had found the café, well as it turned out it was far more than a café because as soon as I was approaching I could hear the sound of music which throughout the years has made berlin very famous and that’s the sound of techno. as I entered in through the main entrance I was confronted with a mixed race of amazing looking people all dressed up and raring to party so little old me headed straight for the bar to get a bottle of becks. the place was packed and with a live dj playing it really did look like I was going to have a ball in berlins main social gathering point called tacheles. this is it I thought at last a place where I could let loose and a chance for a completely different lifestyle change which would brighten my arena…
blog…3.cosmopolitan culture.
after living in pankow 9months at the address I was registered with the the police station it was I felt time to jump ship and flee my current address to a new found one in the district of kreuzberg which is one of berlins livelier areas. looking back at those 9 months past it felt like a journey with a struggle on my shoulders knowing that I was facing another lengthy amount of time in jail, except this time it would be foreign to me. when I was arrested for the taxi issue the police took details of what was on my person which contained some coins and my passport and the cloths I was wearing so at least I thought they will see that I didn’t have the 20 deutch mark note which mike had lent me to get home with. so here I was now living in a rented room on the 5 floor of a block of flats and living with the flat owner whos name is brian. brian rented me his room through silka, a women whom I had met and became good friends with. she was a married women who flew to berlin from England to visit her father brian and so she helped me getting the room for rent. so im now permently living in kreuzberg and moved away from 64 wackenberg strasse which lifted a lot of strain and worry of my back in concern to the arranged court appearance which I missed intentionally because I was scared of going to jail. it didn’t take me too long to forget about the court appearance because kreuzberg had lots of active areas on show which only fuelled my curiosity to discover what the attractions of this place are like and I didn’t take long to get amonst the action of berlin city centre and its possibilities. since I had been in berlin I had never really been in a large attractive city which mad my adventure seem in berlin even larger and brighter than it really is. by now I had discovered mainly the suburbs of the eastern side of berlin which was in many places were dark, colourless and quite remote and bleak. the eastern side of the city of berlin has always been fed the bad dealing of life and poverty included. even then in the early 90s berlin was rejoicing on their new found east and west parody. liberated at last. being and living in berlin in the early 90s meant that the opportunity I was given in watching a cosmopolitan revolution from people all around the world emerged together to seek joining in with the biggest party on the face of the planet at the time. I was aware of the berlin wall getting knocked down cause I remember when it hit the news headlines right across the world. unaware however of how much of a force of celebration that encountered I found totally remarkable and I was desperate to become part of that culture.
blog…2.i dont beleive it, not again.
as each working day passed me I was getting more keen than ever to venture out into the city of berlin so a month had passed since I had arrived in berlin and I was buzzing with excitement because I was earning good money and I had managed to save about £2000 in the first month of being in berlin so I was well happy. by now our plastering gang had increased to 4 blokes working together and still on the same site in straussberg. the extra man was mike who was keen on learning some English from me and on one particular day he invited me back to his place for some diner after we had finished work so I agreed. mike lived about a 15 minute drive from where I lived so it wasn’t a problem catching a taxi back home after diner. so with the food inside our tummies mike offered me a beer which mike loved a beer or two, who didn’t in Germany loved drinking beer, it was a part of the german culture, so as the evening was slowly passing we were heading for the drunken state which we arrived at once mike took the bottle of scottish whisky out of his drinking cabinet. it was getting late so I asked mike to ring for a taxi cab to take me home. I asked mike for 20 deutch marks which was enough to pay for the taxi fare. so in a drunken state by now I eventually gor to sit in the taxi homeward bound to 64 wackenberger strasse. so half way home I asked the taxi driver to pull over so I could get a pizza from a shop, the taxi driver didn’t speak a word of English and started moaning about something or other. I was unable to understand what he was saying because I didn’t know how to speak german either so any way he pulled over and I gave him the 20 marks which mike had lent me and I attempted to get out the taxi to go for my pizza, I had enough change in coins to pay for the pizza so that’s why I gave him the 20 marks so he knew I wouldn’t run of without paying. as I opened the door the taxi driver started shouting at me saying shizzer Englander, Englander Englander and caught hold of me and started hitting me as I tried to get out the door. he managed to pull me back into the taxi and we started to have a little struggle with each other and I was wondering what the hell was happening and before I knew it I was getting pulled out of the taxi by 3 german police men. I remember this moment very vividly because when they pulled me out the taxi my face was shoved into a foot of snow on the pavement. needless to say I was arrested but I was unaware of what I was getting arrested for so off to the police I went. when I arrived at the cop shop I was met by an English speaking solicitor who explained what I was being charged for. you wont believe it but the charge was of an attempted robbery on the taxi man and an assault charge. what the hell I thought, I had made no nasty remarks to the taxi driver and I was positive that I hadn’t hit him first, infact it was the taxi driver who had assaulted me and managed to rob me of my 20 marks. so anyway after being held in the local police station over night I was ordered to leave the next morning but I had to sign into the police station twice a week whilst waiting for a court date. I couldn’t believe it, not again. I had just done two and a half years in England and here I was gobsmacked being on a similar charge of robbery. there had been nothing surer in my life as to me not comitting an offence against this taxi driver. so over the next 8 months as I carried on working and waiting for my court date to arrive I was obviously scared about this case. I didn’t miss signing into the police station not once for 8 months but then my court date had arrived and as you can imagine I was shitting myself. my opinion of that taxi driver by now was not very nice. in order to find out what happened about this case we must wait for another 3 years to pass whilst I was in berlin….
my life in berlin 20yrs ago. 